WHAT the hell?! I’ve been lying on my back for 30 minutes for NOTHING! does that mean I have to take another half an hour, without moving? In this cold room? inside this awful machine? Would I be able to do it?
I could hear my heart beating like crazy, I could feel my cheeks warming up and OH MY GOD! what is that deafening noise, something’s wrong(I press the panic button)… an even louder noise from the alarm is now there and I almost get a heart attack)… Now to be frank, I did make a little research before I actually went for the scan; I saw the machine online, heard a sample of the “noise” (you need to turn on your speakers and volume to the max) but let me tell you something, it’s MUCH WORSE in real life! so in my own defense, I had every right to freak out! Anyway, everything’s shut down, doctor comes in, explains that I will have to put up with this misery for another 30 minutes without moving and leaves.
The frequency was so loud, it felt like someone was digging for petrol right next to my head, believe me I am not exaggerating when I say it was just like torture, evil evil torture. There were different levels and “tunes” of the sound, and the best way to cope with the horrible noise was keeping myself busy thinking of anything else.
Eman: ok, think think, yes, I can count to 100really loud, ok, I can do this: 1, 2, 3, 4 … I CAN’T, I JUST CAAAAAN’T DO THIS, THIS IS SO DAMN LOUD! ok, ok, calm down Eman, let’s try singing, “fireflies” my favorite, tara tatta, hmmm, ”as plaaanet earth turns slowwwwly… it’s hard to say that I’d rather stay awake when I’m asleep”.. crap, not working… I can’t, ok let’s try something more vivid, “I will survive” …1, 2,3, AAAAAAAH MY EAAAAAARS, get me out of here, I want out of here, these earplugs are a joke…wait a second, what’s that, hmm, now we’re talking, nice beat, well done MRI people, I feel I’m in the heart of a disco, yeah, nice, i feel like dancing… but I can’t move so let’s try to enjoy the beat without moving… this sucks…oh no, don’t go, what’s that? horrible noise back again, why, why!
Ok, why do I feel dizzy now? I feel like sleeping, I’m closing my eyes, oh no, I think I got used to the noise! this can’t be good, resist Eman, resist, wakeup, ok I’m awake but my eyes are shut, what does that mean? am I in a coma? am I still alive? (I wink) ok I’m still alive, conscious, good, but I’m gonna keep my eyes shut, it’s somehow better this way… And I think; I think of the past, the present, the future, people, countries, animals, toys, movies, food, drinks, technology, professions, and kids…kids who have to go through this horrible procedure, and I suddenly felt silly. If I, a grown up, turned out to be such a “scaredy-cat”, what would children do? I felt a tear sliding down my cheek… ok, what was that? why am I emotional all of a sudden, is it the MRI? GOSH! it tickles, it tickles, my face is all itchy, I would kill for a little cheek scratch, why on earth did I have to THINK! when am I getting out of here? and suddenly I hear silence, ugly, irritating silence, I went deaf, that’s what it is, I hear nothing but the echoes of MRI noise… wait, I see light, a face, the doctor, is he talking? I can see my earplugs in his hands, why can’t I hear a word he’s saying…come to think of it, the doctor looks silly, he kind of looks like “curious George”, yes, the monkey… I hear something…
Doctor: we’re done, you can get up now.
Eman: (trying to pull myself up with no luck) I can’t move.
Doctor: you’ve been lying on your back without motion for a whole hour, let me help you. We’ll get back to you soon to discuss the results.
Eman: (still hearing noise) ok.
I could barely walk, I get out of the gown, put on my jeans & shirt, and leave. “Weird, the floor is really cold”, I thought, it wasn’t like that before, ah, of course, I forgot to put on my shoes. (check everything’s on) and then head to the washroom to wash my burning face, and only then did I understand why people were staring at me in alarm, no wonder, my face was almost purple.
After a few minutes rest in the lobby I finally went out to get a cab home. The MRI noise kept echoing in my head till it was afternoon, and I know many people had absolutely no problem with an MRI scan, but I did, it disturbed me a big deal, and I didn’t like it one bit, the noise, the terrible noise, I hated it! Ok, you get used to it in a few minutes, but it’s not easy to put up with it for 30 minutes, and it’s so darn hard to stay still all that time. And regardless of how I reacted to the whole experience, I would never wish for anyone to go through it, ever (but in case anyone has to, request decent thick headphones, don’t settle for tiny airplane earplugs)